Adding a new baby into the mix is a life altering change for everyone in your household and often times people forget that this is a massive change for our dogs as well! Having a new little human show up and bring a bunch of new house rules with them is a huge deal for your woofer(s) and there are many ways we can help ease them into this life transition.
The prep work starts long before the baby gets here.
The biggest mistake I see owners make when bringing home a new baby is that they don't start the work until the baby is here. For your dog, this means things are fine one day and then BAM the next day someone new is here and all these new expectations are on them and they don't know how to cope. This leads to undesirable behaviours (whining, pacing, barking and even aggression to just name a few) as your dog tries to navigate the new world while you are distracted with the new baby.
Set your expectations early in the pregnancy.
As soon as you know you're expecting you should sit down with other members of your household and get on the same page of your expectations for the dogs around the baby. Common changes include furniture privileges, you may decide you don't want your dog freely jumping on the couch because the baby is on it, or you may require them to stay completely out of the nursey room. For us, having two blind dogs, we decided that it would be safer to block off the living room area, so in preparation we purchased two new comfy dog beds and a gate that sections off the area. We then started to reward the boys for laying on their beds and staying out of the living room area, and now they happily chose to lay on the beds or in the sun beams in the dining room.
Obedience, Obedience, Obedience!
I've said it before and I'll say it again - you will never regret spending more time on your dog's obedience skills. Having a dog that understands boundaries, expectations and obedience commands will be more comfortable and have an easier time transitioning to the new lifestyle. Things that are smart to work on before the baby gets here (to name just a few) are a quiet cue (teaching them to stop barking on cue), leash manners while walking with a stroller, a place cue so they can be in a safe designated area out of the way when you need it and an "out" cue to have them leave a room, such as the kitchen or nursey.
Conditioning to baby crying
This is a big one that is overlooked often! The majority of dogs are extremely sound sensitive and the repetitive crying of a baby can be extremely stressful to your dog. Not conditioning your dog to these noises can result in a dog that whines, barks, howls or paces every single time the baby cries - which is an awful experience for everyone involved. Throughout your pregnancy, play a baby crying track in the background (linked here) as you work with your dogs. Start by playing the track for just a few seconds and constantly reward and praise your dog while it is playing. Slowly increase the time you play the audio until you are eventually playing it for upwards of an hour - because as we all know those baby lungs can go all day! Teaching your dog to ignore this sound is an invaluable skill you will appreciate when the time comes. Few things are as frustrating as a new parent as dealing with a screaming baby AND an anxious dog!
Secondary to that, you can get your dog used to a physical baby as well long before your actual baby is here
Using a fake doll (this is not the time to borrow the neighbor's toddler), you can practice having your dogs seeing you hold a baby. Some dogs have a high prey drive for small creatures and it sparks a lot of curiosity (that isn't always the good type) and they need to understand this little thing is off limits. While this can seem a little silly to some, it can be a big difference for your dog having you holding something non stop and a new baby can be a huge distraction when asking for a behaviour or doing a training session when your dog is not used to it. The same goes for babies in a carrier or strapped to you as well.
Teach them which items are off limits
This was, and continues to be, a BIG struggle for our toy-obsessed Retriever!
Teach a strong "Leave it" cue and redirect your dog onto the proper items they are allowed to have. Items include the car seat, baby toys, pacifiers, blankets and play mats. Ensuring your dog has adequate items of their own so they can make proper choices on what to chew/play with is equally important.
Get them adjusted to exercise changes
This was a big one for us! We used to enjoy daily off leash hikes with the dogs, but I knew that wouldn't be possible with a new baby for me. During my pregnancy, we started to reduce the amounts of walks slowly so they adjusted easily. We hired a professional dog walker to take the dogs out for me so they still had consistent exercise even when I couldn't get to it. This helped their mental health by giving them an outlet to be dogs, have fun and get tired, and mine by not filling me with guilt over not getting them out that day. It is unfair to your dog to go from daily walks to only getting to it when you can once the little human arrives. If you're in the Fort Saskatchewan area and need a little help getting your woofer out to burn some energy, I can't recommend Fort Dog Fit enough for your walk and check in needs!
Make sure their lives are disrupted as little as possible when you go to the hospital
Labor and delivery can keep you in the hospital from anywhere from a few hours to weeks. Ensuring you have a good dog sitter that your dog knows well already and is comfortable with will cause less stress for your dogs when you are away having your baby. Another thing we did, as our dogs are raw fed and I prep their food, is we put them on a premade raw and bought 2 months worth so I didn't have to food prep for the first little while. I also prepped and packed 2 weeks worth of meals into our deep freeze so the dog sitter (who only ended up with the dogs for 1 night) and we were able to just dump their meals into their bowls quickly without needing to add things. This was a life saver when my husband or mom had to feed the dogs for me! We also made sure their regular walk schedule stayed the same while we were away.
The actual introduction
This should be well thought out and carefully supervised. This is a big deal for your dog (and you) but do not act as such. What I mean by this is you should act as though the baby has always been there. Enter your house as usual and set your baby in a safe area or with a person until you are ready for the introduction. When owners bring the baby in and encourages the dog to approach with "Whos this?!" or "Come say hi!!!" it creates a state of excitement and arousal for your dog which can lead to overstimulation which is what we want to avoid.
Important tips to safely introduce your dog to your baby:
Chose an open area for the first meeting. At no point do you want your dog to feel cornered.
Keep things completely calm and neutral. No excited high pitched talking or jumping around.
Have the baby in a safe and secure space such as the car seat, crib or your arms. Never place the baby/car seat on the floor or somewhere where a loose dog would have free access to the baby. This is very unsafe.
Keep the dog on leash but do not restrain. The leash is there for a safety seatbelt should you need to move the dog away at any time. It is important not to put tension on the leash, as the feeling of being "held back" will likely ramp your dog up more to get closer the baby.
Allow them to approach on their own time. Some dogs will be happily curious right off the bat, but most will be confused and slightly anxious when they first smell/see the baby.
Keep the interactions extremely short. We do not want your dog intensely sniffing or focusing on the baby. Allow them a quick check out and recall them away and instantly reward with lots of high value treats and praise.
Bring your dog into the space and let things happen naturally. Never force an interaction between your dog and the (or any) baby, child or person. If your dog is hyper focusing on the baby, get their attention onto you with high value rewards and training commands. Giving your dog something to do such as a sit, down or trick will keep their mind off the baby. Your dog may want no interaction with the baby and that is okay too. When your dog approaches the baby, allow a second and then happily recall your dog away and reward and let the process start over.
Do not punish the dog in any way. We want to be careful to not accidentally create a negative association to the baby. As an example, if the dog got to close to the baby and the owner reacted poorly by giving them a smack on the nose, the dog may now associate the new baby with getting hit on the nose. We never want to create negative experiences like this for our dogs. If your dog preforms an undesirable behaviour when meeting the baby, calmly remove the dog from the area using their attached leash, give them some time to settle down away from the baby and then retry again later.
*Side note - some owners have heard that bringing home items from the hospital that smell like your baby before you bring them home for the dogs to smell can help ease the transition. While you are more than welcome to do this, the fact is that any items you bring home to your dog will have a wide variety of other smells, not just the new baby. Items will smell like every single person that touched it, the hospital, the cleaning supplies, the car, particles from outside etc etc. The chances of your dog picking out, recognizing and getting used to just the babies sent is very low. But, as I mentioned, doing this won't hurt anything!
Reward good, calm moments around the baby
After the introduction and you are starting to settling into your new routine, make sure you are marking any good moments caught between your dog and the baby. If your dog approaches you while you are holding the baby, gives a quick interest sniff and then walks away, give them lots of praise and reward. Any time they are laying and being calm in the presence of the baby is worth marking and rewarding!
Daily interactions moving forward
Always ensure, no matter how good they may be, that your baby is never left unsupervised around your woofer(s). It only takes a split second for something to happen and safety in this regard is all about prevention.
It can be extremely tempting to pose your baby and your dog for cute photos to share but this isn't worth the risk. Forced posing of your dog and baby sets things up for a tense situation and can lead to things turning dangerous quickly. You should never, at any time, force your dog to interact, sit or pose with a baby for a photo or other purposes. I promise there will be natural opportunities for cute photos when everyone is properly adjusted and comfortable!
The general rule when having dogs around babies is to always have some part of yourself in between the dog and baby, such as a leg when they are both laying on the floor. However, this is personal preference. I do personally allow my dogs safe and calm contact with Everleigh (currently 10 weeks old) when I am there to 100% supervise the interaction when it does naturally happen. When everyone is relaxed and calm, I do not mind these interactions at all. Some people do not want their dog to touch the baby ever, and that is okay and personal preference as well - just make sure you are setting the dog up for success with clear expectations from early on in the pregnancy.
This topic deserves its own post and perhaps I'll write about it one day, but it is never too early to start teaching your child about proper dog care and how to act safely around them. As early as your child starts reaching and grabbing, show them dogs are not toys. It is 100% your responsibility to teach your child proper dog interactions.
Lastly, don't forget about quality time with your dogs!
Going from having all your attention to now sharing you 24/7 with a new little human is life altering for your dog. It is SO crucial to ensure you are still getting quality time with them and still get the opportunity to spend time together. Hire a baby sitter so you can take them for an engaging long walk, sneak in a play session while the little one naps and use their meal time as daily 5-10 minute quick training sessions.
They are still your first babies, were there with you the whole journey leading up to this stage of your life and deserve to be included every step of the way of your new chapter as you transition from pet-parent to human-parent!
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